Condition: Unknown
by Axelkin
Summary: Ichigo and Uryu are about to celebrate their coming of age. But after being served some suspiciously strange tea, Uryu wakes up with a slight problem; one that will change their lives forever. IchiUri. Warnings listed inside.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is a mini chaptered IchiUri request fic for Isame Kuroda. It won't be a very long fic but there's plenty of warnings for this later on. Among such: Alcohol consumption, gender-bending, lemon(s)/sexual content, language, Uryu being angsty and Ichigo being... well Ichigo. lol. This chapter is pretty short though.

The prompt for this is that Ichigo and Uryu are coming of age and the night before the celebration, Uryu is served some very suspicious tea that will change everything for them. I won't spoil much so you'll just have to read to find out!

Coming of age is a big deal for those in Japan and is normally celebrated on one certain day in January (I think, I looked it up the other day. I'll have to look it up again) where they spend time with family and close friends. So, this means they are both already 20 at the start of this fic; they are also roommates in college.

For all my disclaimers and info on other fics, visit my profile page. Also, I don't beta, so you will more than likely find mistakes. Eventually, I'll fix them. :)

Enjoy!

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Condition: Unknown

1

There were some things in life Uryu Ishida was always certain about. Those things consisted of two major things: Ichigo Kurosaki was notoriously unpredictable and when living with said individual you could never be certain about anything. Uryu sighed and tried to keep from tripping over his own feet. His roommate was not so fortunate and stumbled into him, snickering uncontrollably. Pushing the Shinigami back into a standing position, Uryu adjusted his glasses.

"Personal space, Kurosaki."

Ichigo snickered again. "You said 'sake'."

Rolling his eyes, Uryu pressed on back towards their apartment just right outside of their college campus. Tonight he did not feel like arguing. Perhaps it was because he was on the verge of hiccupping. And that would end up in another fit of laughter. "Indeed..." He answered in a low voice.

The cool wind fluttered across his warm face and tugged at his coat. Uryu closed his eyes briefly as they walked down the empty street between apartments. It was odd seeing as what day it was. "Hey, hey, hey!" Ichigo's voice interrupted his thoughts. "'Ssshida," He suppressed a groan at the abuse to his name. "D-do ya -hic- do ya think we've got some at ta' -hic- 'partment?"

Taking a deep breath, Uryu answered. "I know we don't. Have you forgotten? It won't be until tomorrow when we can actually purchase it ourselves." Not that he really cared to be buying sake himself. The liquid had a tendency to loosen too many tongues and normally ended in a combination of hangovers, bad choices, and regrets in the morning.

"Oi!" He turned to see Ichigo looking at him closely with wide eyes. "Yer face's all red."

Uryu nearly backed up into the street lamp poll. He felt his face flare with heat. "Well, that's what happens when one consumes alcohol you idiot." Somehow, Ichigo had convinced him to go out tonight to a small party on campus. Some of the Shinigami had come to visit them to celebrate their coming-of-age ceremony which was being held tomorrow. Of course since their Shinigami friends were old enough, they had purchased a few bottles of liquor and spent a good amount of the evening convincing the two of them to drinking games. Being one not to be impolite, Uryu had a drink. Ok, maybe it was a few. After all, Rukia was being very persistent. "B-besides, Kurosaki, you should see your face. It looks like one of your sisters got a hold of you with makeup and painted you only with red blush."

"Nah, -hic- th-they don't play dress up anymore."

Ichigo waved his hand dramatically and attempted to look important as he started back towards their apartment. Sighing deeply, Uryu straightened back up and followed the stumbling Shinigami. Eventually, they made it back (thankfully in one whole piece) to their door. Uryu, being the only sensible one really and remembered to lock the door and bring the key, let them in.

Once inside, Ichigo preceded to stumble into their living room and face first into the couch. Uryu rolled his eyes as he hung up his coat. _At least he remembered to take off his shoes. _His head spun at the bright overhead light.

"Ya sure we -hic- don't have any?" The words were muffled and slurred as they were spoken through a pillow.

"Seriously?!" Uryu gripped at a chair to keep himself upright. "I'd rather have some tea right now." A groan followed by a string of uncomprehendable words flowed out of Ichigo.

"Ishida-kun! Kurosaki-kun!" A sweet female voice came from the kitchen doorway. "You're home!"

Uryu sighed happily. He turned to face the young girl who walked up to them. "We are, Ururu-san." Ururu stood there clutching a group of packages. "Ah," Uryu glanced at them; hoping one would be freshly bought tealeaves. "Would you be a dear and make me some tea?"

"We don't have any, Ishida-kun."

He eyed the packages more closely and saw a clear sealed bag with green leaves in it. "What about this?" Uryu asked carefully. It was never known what exactly Ururu sometimes carried around.

"Oh, um," She pulled it out without upsetting any of the other packages somehow. "Uruhara-san requested I bring him some things."

"I'm sure Kisuke-sama can just add it to the bill. Please?" Uryu asked before sliding down to the floor and resting his head on the coffee table. Once a week, Ururu came by and cleaned their apartment, sometime restocked their food supplies, and occasionally cooked. Never did she do their laundry, although Ichigo could use a maid who did such a thing for him.

"Oh, ok. I guess so." She replied after seeing his tired expression.

Somehow, between the time it took Ururu to make the tea and it being served, Uryu managed to find his way to his room to change into a dark blue jinbei*. As he tied it closed, Ururu was presenting the hot cup to him. He sniffed it before he took a slip. It was bitterly sweet. "What is it?" He asked.

Ururu shrugged. "Raspberry something. Uruhara-san ordered a lot of things from the Soul Society. It might be American." Why the Soul Society would have American tea was beyond Uryu. He shrugged.

"You drink some of the weirdest shit, 'Shida."

Uryu glared at the patch of orange. "Speak for yourself. At least I won't have a hangover because I drank something besides that fowl liquid." He expected a retort. And what he got was a deep snore. "Honestly!" The archer snorted loudly before continuing to drink his tea. He felt better. Well, his head felt less like a spinning top even if he was starting to get extremely sleepy. "Thank you, Ururu. Put it on our next bill." He yawned, returning the cup and staggering off to his room. "Don't forget to lock the door." His voice was quiet and full of sleep.

The next morning, Uryu could not remember how he had gotten home, removed his glasses, pulled down his covers and slipped into bed. His head was a bit foggy. Slowly he sat up and stretched. Yawning deeply he wondered why his muscles felt so strange, especially around his chest. He started to reach for his glasses but stopped. His hands shook and he untied his jinbei. _Don't panic, don't panic..._ Franticly, he fumbled with the hem of his pants and reached down to touch smooth flesh. That was when he screamed.

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*A jinbei is a style of pajamas in Japan that loosely look like a shirt and pants version of a kimono. Young men also will wear them around family and friends they feel comfortable with.

Kuro-san: I hope this lightens your mood today. :) Don't fret though, there will be Uryu angst later on!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Ah yes, I'm sure you all want to know why Uryu was screaming. Welp, here you go! Ichigo time too! Enjoy!

Warnings: alcohol consumption, gender-bending, lemon(s)/sexual content, some language, Uryu being angsty and Ichigo being... well, Ichigo.

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2

Ichigo nuzzled into the softness bellow him. It was tender and he reached out to weave his fingers through the silky hair of the dark beauty. Hot and needy, he started to pant as he let his hands wonder south to touch- Someone screamed, ripping Ichigo out of his dream and landing him directly on the floor. He groaned. His head hurt, his knees hurt, hell, every inch of him ached. "Fuck!" He drawled out. Glancing around, Ichigo noticed that he was in his apartment, on the floor in the living room of his apartment to be exact.

Slowly the world came back to Ichigo. Pieces fell into place as he rubbed his head in attempt to clear his head. Easing himself back up onto the couch he wondered why he woke up on the floor when clearly he had slept on the couch. A small spot of drool marked on the messy pillow at the end of the couch told him. _And I was having such a nice dream too._ Then he remembered. Someone had screamed. It was not too muffled meaning it was not one of their neighbors. Looking around he saw that he was alone in the living room and could clearly see into the kitchen from where he sat.

_Ok, what gives? Did I dream that too?_ His mouth felt parched and he stood to stumble into the kitchen for a glass of water. Eventually his head started to defog. _Well, if it wasn't one of our neighbors and I was clearly having a good dream. That would leave-_ "Oh shit, Ishida!"

As quick as his lethargic body allowed him, Ichigo made his way down to the bedrooms. _But why would Ishida be screaming? It's not like anything could scare him._ The almighty Quincy would have a thing or two to say about that thought as well.

Reaching Uryu's bedroom, he knocked slightly before cracking the door open. "Ishida? You awake?" Clearly the archer was awake as he was sitting up in bed with his back towards the door and clutching himself very tightly. "You ok? I thought I heard something."

Ichigo might not be the smartest person alive, but he knew when something was amiss. He watched as Uryu shook his head and answered him. "I'm fine, Kurosaki." Nothing else. No excuse or retort or yelling at him to get out of his room. Clearly something was wrong. The all too cool voice told him so.

Taking initiative on his instincts, he edged himself inside the archer's room. "You sure?"

Finally, his roommate turned to face him. Uryu's arms still wrapped tightly around his torso, he glared. Without his glasses it did not look as convincing. Actually, something look terribly off about the Quincy. "Quite. Now if you excuse me, I need to get ready. And so do you." But neither of them moved. Ichigo stood halfway between the door and Uryu's bed and Uryu did not twitch to even pick up his glasses and slide out of bed.

"You don't look so good."

"I'm fine."

"I know you're not still hangover."

"Obviously, now move."

"It's not like I'm in the way."

"Well then, get out."

"You're face looks hot. Ya sure you're okay?"

"Dammit, Kurosaki! Just leave it alone!" Uryu started to pant in a strange way. He had seen the Quincy get worked up but this was on a whole other level. Stepping closer, Ichigo took a better look at his roommate. Flushed face and heated eyes were glaring intensely and Uryu's grip around his torso got tighter. It behavior was completely unlike the Uryu he had known for years. Sure they argued all the time, but this was different.

"What gives, man? You look sick and I'm just trying to make sure you don't need help!" Ichigo met the gaze with one of his own.

"I don't need your help, Kurosaki." The words came out in a hiss between clenched teeth.

"Well with that attitude, no one would want to help you."

"Why do you always have to be so prying?!"

"I'm just trying to make sure nothings horribly wrong with you." Although, with that statement, Ichigo was sure that there had always been something wrong with Uryu.

"Well, even if there was it's none of your concern."

"Uh, yes it is!"

"How so?"

"I'm your friend!"

"We're not friends!"

"Uhg, not this again, Ishida. What's wrong with you?!"

"You want to know what's wrong?"

"Yes!" The static between them flared as they argued, staring each other down. This was a norm and Ichigo was sure they had woken many people in the adjacent apartments with their arguments. But what Uryu did next was something Ichigo would have never predicted.

"_This_ is what's wrong!"

Uryu faced him completely and unwrapped his arms, flinging open his night jinbei and all Ichigo could do was stare. His mouth hung open in shock. For a full minute Ichigo stared at the smooth perk skin. The blue tattooed scar stood out even more then it ever had. "You- you-" He blinked and almost pointed and laughed. "You're a girl!"

As if the words suddenly brought realization down upon them, Uryu's face flushed even deeper and he shut his robes closed quickly. "I'm not a girl, Kurosaki."

Ichigo chuckled and came to sit down next to Uryu. The later twitched uncomfortably. "Ya sure about that? Guys don't have breasts like that."

Uryu flinched at the comment then glared. A part of the Shinigami started. It was strange being this close to Uryu in such a delicate situation. "Well, I sure as hell didn't go to sleep like this." The archer frowned deeply.

"Hmm," They sat there in silence for a moment. Slowly Ichigo began to worry. Sure he would believe Uryu because he had never known the other to lie. Hell, Uryu seemed just as shocked about it as he was. And now that he had gotten over the fact that his roommate was now sporting a pair of very female breasts, Ichigo started to think in a medical way. "Perhaps we should go see Kisuke."

"Why would I want-" Ichigo was not paying attention to what Uryu was saying. Instead he sat up on his knees and moved closer towards the archer. "Are you listening to me, Kurosaki?" In fact, it was safe to say, Ichigo was not really paying any heed to what he was about to do. If he had stopped to think, he might have reconsidered it. Or if he even saw the very wide and slightly frightened azure eyes looking directly at him would he have stopped. But Ichigo had to know; for medical reasons that is. "Oi! What-?!"

Uryu did not get the chance to finish asking what ever it was he was about to ask. The Shinigami leaned over and grasped the front of Uryu's pants and slid his hand inside. What he felt came to a bit of a surprise. There was a small trail of hair in the middle of smooth, soft flesh. Ichigo did not even get a chance to stop. Next thing he knew, Uryu gasped loudly and yanked away, jumping off the bed and rising up his arms. The air felt dense with reisti in that family way when Uryu gathered up the spirit partials. Ichigo backed up with his hands in the air. "Relax will ya?"

"What the hell do you think you were doing?" Uryu glared at him. It was still odd to see him without glasses and Ichigo felt like it took all the menacing stature away.

"Tch, I was seeing if you had any other side effects that's all. It's not like I was groping you or anything. I doubt you'd want Kisuke's hands all over you examining what changed and he'll want to know the extent of the change." For once in his life, Ichigo felt proud that he sounded smart about what he was doing.

"Oh," The bow dematerialized and Uryu lowered his arms again. Uryu flushed deeply again, hugging himself with one arm and looked away. After all, Ichigo had just touched him in a very intimate place. If he had stopped to think, maybe he would have just felt over Uryu's pants instead. But he did not know the other did not sleep without anything under them. He felt his face heat up and tried to cover it up by standing up, handing Uryu his glasses from the nightstand and clearing his throat.

"Here," Uryu mumbled his gratitude and slid the frames onto his face. "By the way, I didn't know you shaved."

The glare was back, but it still struck Ichigo as funny. Uryu's lip twitched. He looked around as if trying to find something to throw at Ichigo. "Get out! And get ready you idiot! We're already late!"

Instead, the archer launched himself at the already retreating Shinigami who was laughing. Ichigo loved it when he was able to get under Uryu's skin. He ran into the bathroom and slammed the door before his attacker could reach him. Snickering, he started to undress for a quick shower. In the middle of taking off his shirt, Ichigo stopped. It was then that he realized that he had really touched Uryu, down there, and he was not cringing. His mouth went dry as he stared at the offending hand. Actually, he kind of liked it. _Okay, now it's weird._


End file.
